full-term sounds a little scarier than it is. it means i'm 37 weeks today and if i go into labor, the OB won't do anything to stop it because the baby's lungs are most likely mature enough to breathe on his own. BT weights about 6 1/3 pounds and measures a bit over 19 inches, head to heel (like a stalk of Swiss chard). he doesn't have the peach fuzz visible on the ultrasound like rani did, so maybe he won't be as much of a benjamin franklin as a kojak when he's born.
i was awakened at 4:30 this morning with a lot of cramping. after an hour of trying to ignore it hoping it was just hunger pangs, i realized i may be having a contraction. it's funny how i've forgotten what such intense pain could mean! it's now 5:45 AM and while waiting out the contraction,
i've eaten a bowl of cocoa puffs, downloaded all the pictures and recharged my camera in preparation, and started thinking of what i need to put in my hospital bag. yes, i'm a planner and am shocked at myself for not already having a hospital bag packed, but it was on the 'to do' list for today!
i cannot believe little BT is going to be here as early as a few days (or a few weeks) from now. it's amazing, but i'm scared. scared like i never was with rani. i'm nervous about labor, about having two kids, about being a good mom when i'm pulled in so many different directions. before rani was here, i didn't worry about the domestic side of my life--i figured it would just unfurl itself on its own with minimal need for dedicated cogitation.
i didn't think about setting up life insurance policies, or how to logistically fit a toddler, a newborn, my mom (who will be helping us out the first few months) and both of us into a two bedroom condo. i didn't check out kiddie events in parent magazines, or have a camcorder as a third arm, or have a hyped up sense of arousal when i saw a kid swinging too high on the swing. double strollers were just things that got in my way in elevators, and the only kind of pump i knew about was the kind i filled my tires with.
the entire axis of my world is shifting again, and it seems that having two kids only cements the loose gravel left over from the tectonic rumblings of one. i'm so happy about BT coming, but even after i start working again, i will truly transform into the quintessential soccer mom. happily. i'm okay with the minivan, the shoebox dioramas, the chaperoned trips to the museum. i'm excited about parent- teacher conferences and helping with music lessons. i cannot WAIT to teach them how to read! rani already recognizes most of the letters of the alphabet and has several of her books memorized, which makes me so proud, AND she sits on her potty and peruses car and driver magazine, which lifts rups' sense of accomplishment to an all-time high.
so it's almost 6:30 in the morning and the cramping has completely stopped. my first false contraction (as opposed to the hundreds of braxton-hicks contractions i've been having for the past month). so much for early contractions and a halloween baby. BT is supposed to be a november baby like rani and me, anyway.
a few hours later: i just came back from my weekly OB visit, and she said since the cramping lasted so long, it was probably more a muscle spasm than a contraction. AND she said the second baby usually comes later than the first. wha...??? i am going to be ready after this weekend, so BT and i cut a deal that if he came between november 1st and 6th (rather than the 16th like he's scheduled to), i would resist putting him in the vast majority of rani's pink clothes. in fact, he was the one that suggested this compromise, so i have no doubt he'll follow through. otherwise, there are some very cute pink homecoming hats i've got prepared... i wonder if they make pink wee blockers.
BT will be here in six weeks. really?? he's 34 weeks "old" right now but already i feel like a breadstick tied to a watermelon. one that looks and feels exhausted and hasn't combed her hair in two days. and by the looks of these pictures, i could stand to do some laundry. (no comments, please).
i just got back from doing a just-for-fun ultrasound at rups' hospital, where the super sweet ultrasound tech did a full exam and printed out several pictures. BT weighs 4 pounds, 13 ounces (+/- 12 ounces) as of this morning. the last couple months, they grow half a pound a week; at this rate, he'll be about 7-8 pounds when i deliver. rani was 6 pounds and the delivery went fine, but i'm a little nervous about popping out this 'big' baby of mine. i don't know how women deliver 9 and 10 pound babies! or twins!hats off to them.
BT definitely has rups' profile with the prominent, i mean aristocratic, nose and all. rups insists it's just shadowing artifact from the ultrasound, but i'm not convinced. artifact in the exact same place in 6 out of 6 pictures? he's a typical boy--he had no patience for posing for pictures--he kept waving his hand in front of his face as if to say, "yeah, yeah, are you done yet?". huh...maybe he had something better to do. he's the weight of an average cantaloupe, and is about 18 inches long. his fat layers are filling out so his skin is smoother and less-alien like.
i feel a little less anxious because a baby born at 34 weeks with no other problems usually does as well as full-term babies. i'm all about superstition, though, so i want him sitting and jumping in there as long as he wants, which better be at least 38 weeks.
as usual, there's a ridiculous amount of stuff going on with us: rani turns 2 in six weeks (for two days, i'll have "2 under 2"), rups just ran his 5th marathon and got one of his best times ever, we're all moved back into our milwaukee condo, we picked out a nanny for the baby and a "school" for rani, and after almost 32 years, i've finally developed an addiction. internet shopping. it's awesome! you don't have to leave the house, you can do it late at night, you don't have to pay tax or shipping if you're savvy, and there are, sigh, coupon codes everywhere! i have bought everything from diapers to jewelry to winter boots to a 2 TB external hard drive to a futon mattress, all in the last week! all stuff we needed, of course. and cheaper than if i'd gone to the store! rups says i need to get a job just so i don't spend the salary i would be making on internet shopping. sadly, i agree with him.
so the job hunt is going to start next week. i'm thinking i'll give myself my three-four month maternity leave, so i'll start working again in march. i'm already feeling so tired all the time (just looking at the pics of myself makes me feel tired all over again) that i can't even imagine working right now, but i miss it. it's been a year and though it's been fun, i'm not cut out for being a full-time stay-at-home-mom, no matter how challenging it is!
the top two pics were taken tonight (30 weeks) and yes, my shirt does say "everyone loves a pregnant chick". at this point, i am not beyond cheesy puns if the shirt is comfortable. the bottom two were during our hawaii babymoon last month, so i was 26 weeks at the time. rani is kissing the baby in one of the pictures--she also tries looking for him through my belly button. :)
BT has been doing externally visible somersaults in me for about a month now, and every time the alien invasion picks up speed, rani stares with rapture. or confusion. BT is about 15.7 inches long now and weighs almost 3 pounds (about a head of cabbage). his eyesight still is consistent with legally blind status, but it's developing. we got rani a big magnetic easel yesterday, and for fun i spelled out the boy name we are thinking of with rainbow-colored magnetic letters. it looked right and it felt right, and when rups got home from work, he first smiled at my flight into toddlerhood and then agreed that the name just fit. so i think we have a name. it's not a cutesy rhyming name with rani, it's not very common (we actually thought we'd made it up but it turns out that though it's rare, it does exist), and it's something westerners can pronounce. i hope. the nickname is a unisex name, but those are all the hints you're getting. oh, and it does not start with x, y, or z.
since i'm planning on returning to work a few months after BT arrives, the nanny search has begun. we really liked our first interviewee, but figured we should interview a few more before handing over our babies to her. the second one called to confirm a couple hours before the interview and didn't even show up! no phone call, no email, no response to my voicemail messages hoping she was okay, nothing!! i worried about her all weekend, but then saw that she checked her nanny profile monday so i wrote a very candid one-star review about her not showing up for the interview. other parents should know! we have about three more interviews and then we'll make a decision. kinda nervous--rani's never had someone other than family watch her for more than a couple hours, and even then, a friend watched her just the one time! now i have to hand over my three month old to a stranger...that's going to be hard. any of you want to move to milwaukee and be our full-time nanny?
as for the pregnancy, i'm heavier, i'm clumsier, and i knock over things with my stomach and my butt, of which i used to know the proportions but have long since lost track of. supposedly the clumsiness can be attributed to my new center of gravity, but i don't think that explains the shelf-a**. i do have to say, though, that i think rups is a pretty darn lucky guy. i haven't had any mood swings, crazy cravings, or ridiculous demands that i insist he cater to within four seconds. except for the fact that i may be buying a few maternity clothes this pregnancy, our lives are pretty much the same. our weekends are still ridiculously busy, i still let him go running in the evenings even when toddler-rearing is the most hectic, and i stay up with him to catch up on entourage.
i am getting more excited than i was at the beginning of this pregnancy, which is great. some of the excitement that was wrapped into reading reviews and buying baby stuff is lost, though, since we have pretty much everything we need from rani's first year. i did, however, just buy a double stroller (for the amount of double strollers nowadays, you'd think they'd require car insurance!) which was fun and exciting as far as stroller shopping goes. :) we even went to REI between a wedding and reception this weekend (yes, i checked out strollers while rocking full indian garb replete with sari, bindi and bangles) to test drive them. let's hope the BOB revolution is as revolutionary as it claims to be.
i've already done BT's laundry but we still have several carfuls of baby items (bouncer, activity gym, infant car seat, etc) to bring from niles to milwaukee. he's going to have to deal with some pink fluffy items--they're still perfectly manly if you ask me.
other than that, life is good. we're back in our condo in milwaukee, rups is liking his new job, i'll begin searching for my dream job soon, and i'm just taking it as easy as i can before my life changes dramatically. again.
this little boy growing inside me is 23 utero weeks old and supposedly has a sense of movement that's well enough developed that he can feel me dance. that is really unfortunate for him. he's more than 11 inches long and weighs just over a pound, which is the size of a large mango (and the amount of lasagna i ate last night). he can hear now, and i'm sure what he hears most loudly is rani. she's always saying things like "baby kick" and "baby kiss", which are very cute, but these are interspersed between the more vociferous "no rice!!!" and "bicycle!!!" and when he hears her, he kicks. i said it before and i'll say it again, this boy is a ridiculously strong kicker. what the heck, he's the size of a mango! how can he kick so hard?? lately he starts around 4 pm and goes till midnight, which cuts down my cinnamon bun sleep time to about 6 hours total.
i started with my new OB in milwaukee, someone i chose randomly from the providers' website. my criteria: female. no offense to male OBs, but the thought of a guy being so personal is just kind of weird. she was friendly and approachable, and unlike in chicago, there was absolutely no wait time at the clinic, which i forgot was even an option. there was free valet parking and the staff were super nice. really? what was the catch? i found out...apparently the hospital i'll be delivering at is the hospital version of motel 6 in regards to aesthetics. it's got the best nicu and emergency services in the downtown area, but instead of rothkos on the wall, it has disproportionate seagulls; instead of mahogany banisters, it's got light colored laminate plastic. all of which i'm fine with as long as i don't have to deliver in a triage room like i did last time when the other fancy-schmancy hospital was full. i even worked there as a resident at one point! hmph.
so now for the news all my girlfriends are going to be secretly ecstatic to hear: at this halfway point i've already gained the amount of weight i gained in my entire last pregnancy. sixteen pounds. and counting. if i keep on track and gain a pound a week, i'll be up 33 pounds by the end. i might actually have to start working out after this delivery. then again...a toddler, a newborn, looking for a new house, and going back to work? i think that might do the job for me.
here's a prego pic and a 3D ultrasound at 20 weeks. it's so odd--we're looking at BT's face, the one i won't see in person for another five months! he looks like rups to me. shouldn't at least one of my kids look like me???
